Porn Site Reveals Physical and Legal Perils of Bicycle Masturbation

First up, there is no more evidence that the above ass that landed in our inbox belongs to a Hungarian chick than that the highway code question below it ("Should you overtake in this situation?") is genuine. Except that it is an extremely fine and Hungarian-looking ass, of course.

Secondly, with cyclists as pursuit-friendly as that on the roads, we can almost believe a report on Hungoporn site Ashole.hu of a 61 year-old man spotted by eyewitnesses riding his bike and spanking his monkey at the same time last summer. An athletic feat for a man half his age, which is probably why he came a cropper. Ashole takes up the story:

He was cycling along holding the handlebar with his left hand, while pleasuring himself with abandon with his right. As he reached the peak [this bit is ambiguous], he forgot to peddle and literally fell on his face, breaking his nose and cheekbone.

In addition to the three years in the slammer he could receive for indecent exposure, he may also face a Ft 30,000 fine for riding without both hands on the handlebars.

Like most things we read on porn sites, it's best to file this one under "if only it were true."